I’m a firm believer in attending church weekly. If you didn’t get a chance to attend this weekend, here is a sermon you can listen to.
I’ve been attending this church for about four years now and I have learned so much. I have also grown from participating in Celebrate Recovery that Pastor Steve mentioned. I graduated from this Christian 12 step program.
Also, I am a Stephen Minister. I attended 50 hours of training to learn more about listening to others as they process through the life they are living. And I was fortunate enough to be assigned to someone who helped me through a rough area of life.
Yes, a Stephen Minister can take a break when life hits them with a blow and be ministered to as well.
I have participated in 3 different Life Groups or Home Group/Core Group as some of you might call it. The wisdom that was represented in these groups. And the camaraderie that I experienced was great for me.
So these are some of the Ministry Helps and opportunities to grow at Ten Mile Christian Church that can help you in your journey.
I hope you will take a listen and stop by if you are looking for a church HOME.
Watch ILMC Authenticity
Sunday, January 12th, 2020 sermon at Ten Mile Christian Church
Have you ever struggled with money? I was just looking at my journal, on October 7, 2000, to see I had written that I had a struggle with money…the lack thereof.
While in the spirit of poverty or having a poverty mindset, I would go to a local store, spend $10 so I could get a free bus pass. After awhile, I thought it would be so much simpler to buy a monthly bus pass until my car came, the car I was praying for. I was constantly praying for a new-to-me car.
I felt that I couldn’tt afford a monthly bus pass on my current manifested income…actual dollars in my checkbook. I know that the LORD has is all, owning all the silver and gold as it says in the bible at Haggai 2:8 and that he owns the cattle on a thousand hills, Psalms 50:10. I did not have the faith at that time to believe God would cover a monthly bus pass.
So in dealing with my current income, I was trying to not be bitter over that fact that my former husband was not paying all the income he was court ordered to do. I was living on half of what was ordered. And I asked myself, What is wrong with wanting every cent due me? Was that vengeance, pride or greed? I kept thinking that things would not be so hard, financially, if I was getting all the money that I was suppose to get.
I was even trying to use the bus transfer option which would normally allowed me to transfer to a completely different bus route. So I was using the bus transfer that would allow me to have an hour before returning on the same bus route. I tried to use my bus transfer instead of having to put in 65 cents to return home on the bus.
Because I was not totally trying to abuse the system and I did not feel I had the 65 cents, I would just walk back home with my girls in tow. I hated begging people for a ride. It was not like I had a standing offer for rides all the time. I didn’t mind asking if the subject came up or if I knew a person was going to be out driving already. So I continued to pray for the right perspective on how to get around town.
That evening, I was remembering the scripture that said to not be envious at the prosperity of the wicked. I was hearing from my relatives that my ex-husband had bought a house. At the time, I was still living in a little apartment. When I talked to my then 20 year old son, he told me how he had a lap top, a PC, a nice apartment with no debt. I was still dealing with the debt of the divorce. I had no car and I only had a word processor. My girls, then five and six years old, and I would walk to the library to use the 3 computers for each of us.
So that scripture came back to me of not being envious of wicked men and their prosperity. Though it seemed like I was the only one not doing well…financially. At that time, I did have peace and safety from the LORD. I don’t know if my ex and son were living for the LORD in their apparent richness.
These thoughts came to me as I was walking one day with my girls trying to save that 65 cents instead of riding the bus:
I thought, No More! From this point on, I am going to spend the 65 cents to ride the bus when I need to, when it is raining, when I am too tired to walk, or whenever I feel the Holy Spirit leading me to do so.
So, on Oct. 8, 2000, I had a realization:
I am not limited by my limited income. I am not.
So here is another concept that used to bug me. Whenever I wanted to do something nice for my girls like take them out for a Happy Meal, I would go through the drive thru and HOPED no one had seen me especially anyone who knew I was a “poor” single mom. I did not want to be judged as squandering my money. Yet, how would any one know how I scraped and saved to be able to treat my girls once a month? Who really knows if I was blessed with a gift and part of my giving back is giving to my girls?
At a later time, I can tell you the story of how someone blessed me with $300 for Christmas and I sensed the HOLY Spirit was telling me to give my daughters a $100 each for Christmas. I thought, WHAT?!?!? It was one of those times when you think you could not possibly be hearing from God. So I’ll let you know the outcome of that in another story. Just know that God is good…All the time.
During this time of my life, I did not feel like a Million Bucks like I did just the year before in 1999. Then, I felt like a million bucks and like I would be a millionaire. But in October of 2000, struggling to pay 65 cents for a bus pass and hearing how my ex-husband and son seemed to be prospering, I felt like a single ghetto mom living below the poverty line. And then the revelation came: “I am not limited to or by my limited income.”
In the natural, it looks like my income is limited. But God’s resources to me are not limited. He has caused men and women to give into my bosom, good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over it states in Luke 6:38. God can move any number of people with any number of dollars until he releases me to make my own income.
You have to understand that during this time, my calling was to be a stay-at-home mother of my two young daughters. God was not allowing me to go out and get a public job or pursue a business in home. I was homeschooling my two girls full time in Kindergarten and First Grades. I simply made due with what he provided, obeying God’s leading to stay at home.
I’ll have to tell you a side note. When the Police Auxiliary called up every year asking for donations, I would kindly tell them that I was putting my extra dollars back into my daughters so that they wouldn’t be on the streets as teenager and in their twenties needing the police to help curtail their evil doings against society. I felt I was doing my part for the Police by training my girls up right so they would not be gang bangers. It was times like this that made me confident in God’s calling on my life to be a stay-at-home mother, limiting the evil that my girls were exposed to over the years. I did graduate them from 12th grade homeschool. So on with the story….
Here it is 2017 and I am looking at my journal of October 2000, being reminded of a word to my spirit just the month before: “God has a greater work for you more than you can imagine. Just stay FAITHFUL!”
It did take great faith to remain a stay-at-home mom when my daughters wanted me to get a car so we were not walking so much. And when they wanted a computer, I reminded them that we would still have to share that ONE computer.
Sometimes, we let our feelings shipwreck what God has spoken to our spirits. Sometimes, we let other people shipwreck God’s vision for our life by their words of limited understanding. If I had listened to people, I would not have been in California experiencing the beginnings of coming out of a poverty mindset. I could have been still (stuck) in North Carolina because people thought I was uprooting my girls. Also, my own feelings could have kept me in North Carolina when I didn’t have the money to move as I believed God was directing.
Or I could have been stuck in Ohio, where my parents were begging me to not move to North Carolina. I told my mother, who is still alive as of this writing, that I could not even justify praying to God, if I got into future trouble in Ohio, after I felt God directing me to move to North Carolina. Obedience to God was very important to me! And still is to this day.
Remember the scripture that says that God owns the cattle upon a thousand hills (Psalms 50:10) and how God owns all the silver and gold (Haggai 2:8)? He will and does place people strategically in our lives to get his purposes accomplished. So God did work out a miracle for me to move to California…more than one financial miracle…just in the nick of time.
On October 8, 2000, a Sunday evening, I recorded the decision I made:
From feeling so poor, I decided that I was going to ride the bus when I needed to even by putting money in the coin box on the bus and not scheming with bus transfer, getting rides and constantly going to that one (expensive) grocery store to spend $10 just to get a free bus pass. It was like I was enabling my poverty mentality.
No one had challenged me with this question,
“What is 65 cents? Just plop it down and go where you have to!”
I was limiting myself by my limited income and possible limiting the Holy One of Israel (Psalm 78:41)
My not spending 65 cents when I needed to was like complaining when I probably had 65 cents on me. It was like I was concerned for tomorrow. It was like, if today I ride the bus, what happens if I REALLY, REALLY NEED to ride the bus tomorrow? The bible tells us to not take thought for tomorrow for today has sufficient sorrows. Read it at Matthew 6:34.
Also, my trying so hard to get a free bus pass was taking a gamble that they were still giving away free bus passes. Suppose I spent that money in that expensive grocery store and got to the cashier to find they had discontinued that program? Now what?
Mark 10:27b, with God all things are possible. The bible doesn’t add that only with certain circumstances, all things are possible with God.
I claimed this scriptures for me and I accepted it on Oct. 9, 2000 at 9:12 pm.
Out of Egypt
Poverty draws a line and dares you to step over it!
And because of poverty, people also draw a line for you and dare you to step over it. What do you think the Welfare system does for people? It provides but it also limits.
It’s like you can’t ever go out to eat, behind that line of poverty. Forget having a cell phone or a nice car. Appearances cause people to judge and try to force one behind the lines of Assumed and Presumed Poverty. I would like to think that another person would not want that to happen to them. But we sometimes do it to ourselves…like the unwritten code of poverty.
I can remember sitting with some trustees of a church who were helping me with my budget. It was almost comical in that I had hardly any money and not enough to pay all of my bills. What would the meeting have done for my budget? If I have 500 dollars and my bills are 600, how do you budget that? Logic would reason that you can never go out to eat, have a cell phone or drive a car.
But God…. But God in his infinite mercy and wisdom has it all under control if you let Him have It! You have to surrender the areas of your finances to God. So many Christian people think that they are surrendered to God yet they really don’t surrender all areas of their life to God.
Now granted, sometimes it is not on purpose. Sometimes, you just don’t realize a certain area is not surrendered. So I am not hating on ignorance, the act of not knowing. You can’t do something about somethings you don’t know…until you find out.
Once you know you have been holding back and not surrendering an area to the LORD, then you have a choice. Yes, God still gives us free will even in surrendering to Him.
So once I stepped over the line of poverty and started to not have a poverty mindset, I started viewing money differently. I was much more free to obey God’s leading in my everyday life now that I surrendered my financial area of life to the LORD and not let my limited income dictate so much to me. And I stop letting people’s EXPECTATIONS of me in my financial situation dictate to me how I would be, where I would go, what I would do, how I dress, how I carry myself and so on.
And do you know, when I started dating a couple of years later, the men I dated thought I was rich. Some of them were shocked that I lived in a little apartment. They were so called drawn to me because they thought I would help them out in their financial situations. Can you imagine that? I was still getting the same amount of money as when I was in the spirit of poverty except for a couple of cost of living increases which was not substantial by any means. But I suddenly looked different to men. My scent had changed….(Jeremiah 48:11). I was no longer captive to the poverty mindset.
So back to the church trustee meeting over my finances. They could only offer suggestions of things to cut out like cable TV or stamps to mail letters to my friends. Really, those were my only entertainment at that time. There was another time, a couple of years later, where my outgo extended past my income. But God…God made a way before the 15th of each month to have all of my bills paid and my needs met for me and my girls. Trust Him! It works.
I no longer felt guilty when the LORD let me make extra purchases or led me to so something that cost more than I would have thought to pay. I dared to step over the line of poverty and not let my limited income in the earth realm limit the possibilities for how God would use me and what he could call me to do.
Case in point, I learned to move to another home with much more ease. Even though I knew a move out of state was upcoming, the Lord would NEVER let me save up for it. God would always do a financial miracle for me to move. And it was not always someone writing a big check to cover all of my moving expenses. That only happened once in the 5 moves I made across the country. I learned to have more faith that could would provide where he was guiding me.
So have you ever felt like someone was saying about your situation, How dare you? I felt like people were silently challenging me, mentally saying, “How dare she step across that line of poverty!”
As of this writing, at the end of 2017, I continue to trust the LORD for my finances. I continue to seek his will for my daily activities. Do you?
I hope you enjoyed this story of how 65 cents changed my life and began my process of coming out of the poverty mindset.
My name is Nek’ka Migel. I am a grateful believer in Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior. Thanks for reading and I do hope you will comment and share your story with others.
Hello. My name is Nek’ka Migel. I was a single mom for 16 years. I homeschooled my 2 children from Kindergarten to 12th grade. When they graduated from High School they went directly into college. One got her 2 year certificate in Baking and the other has 4 years and running studying Mechanical Engineer. Both daughters have had their own businesses.
One has done designer baking and the other has a web design business. I would say they were successfully released into the world with many relational skills and the ability to live on their own successfully without my paying their way or having them move back home after college. I am very happy for their success and their ability to make things work for their lives.
Consulting for Single Parents is a dba of Single Moms Unite!, LLC. There is a Facebook page that you and your friends can like: click here. There is a closed Facebook group for single moms: click here and a closed group for single dads: click here.
If you would like to join my email newsletter list, go here to sign up.
There are 5 areas for Single Parent consultation.
1. Emotional and Spiritual Stability
2. Child Rearing and Parenting skills
4. Business ideas/Job helps
This consultation process is to help guide you to make your own choices out of the tools I present or the thoughts that come to your mind as I speak and present short stories and local resources available. I am not a Licensed Counselor but can refer you to another place if that is what you need. I am more of a Peer Consultant who has experienced being a single parents and have victory over many areas in my life. I am happy to share these experiences with you as they pertain to your life’s upcoming victories.
The reason I charge a nominal fee is because I have discovered that many people do not respect free. But when there is “skin in the game”, they stay committed to the process or at least to begin the process. Also, my time is valuable and if I travel to meet you in a coffee house, the gas in my car, cost dollars.
If you are here, you have decided to do the work necessary to get you to your next level. So let me hear from you what you think you need. The purpose of having one to one consultations is to get specific information to you for your own life.
Area 1: Emotional and Spiritual stability.
What makes me a good authority on this matter is because I have stable emotions and I can share some ways to think and pray, if you are a praying person, to arrive at stable emotions. I can be a peer consultant for PTSD as I am on my own journey and have made great strides in setting healthy boundaries and being able to enforce them. I can be a peer consultant for alcoholism. I have been 30 years without abusing alcohol and the temptation to drink out of necessity has been gone for 30 years.
I have been a Christian for 30 years and have a good working knowledge of the Christian Holy bible and I have a good relationship with Our Father in Heaven. So I believe I can be a good support in this area as well. For more information on the ministry that I have done in my 30 years of being a Christian, I will refer you to the Video Resume for my being a Prayer Intercessor. I also have a written copy if desired in my Chaplains for Businesses Newsletter.
So, what is your why for wanting to have greater emotional and spiritual well being? How would this stability help you to get to your next level in life? Part of this consultation requires you to think about your life and where you want to go. My job is to help you in the good direction that you have chosen already. So let’s get started.
Across the nation, there are a variety of organizations that can help you.
1. Stephen’s Ministry is designed to come along a gender to gender person going through an issue of life that is not too extreme yet it might be painful such as the death of a spouse or other love one, a divorce or you just can’t seem to keep working.
2. Celebrate Recovery helps a person deal with their hurts, habits and hangups. It is here that I gained a year of setting healthy boundaries and I continue to work on procrastination and fear. They also help with alcohol and substance abuse like a secular AA meeting might. Celebrate Recovery is Christian based.
3. National Abuse Hotline is 800-799-7233. The call is anonymous and they are trained very well to hear your situation before responding verbally on the phone. When I have called, they have never steered me wrong.
4. Healing Rooms are all over the USA. This is another place you can get Christian prayer in addition to the prayer time you might have at your local church. All Prayer Intercessors are vetted before they are allowed to serve.
And in your individual city there are other organizations that give a person a hand up. In the Boise area, there is
1. Weekly prayer available at Sacred Heart Catholic Church. They offer Christian prayers.
2. F.A.C.E.S. for classes on abuse and self defense. 208-577-4403
3. WCA for the abused woman or man, call 208-343-3688. They have a number of resources such as a financial literacy class and a court advocate to make suggestions for how you can get further help on your legal case.
I am also familiar with a number of church denominations and would be happy to share that knowledge if you are looking for a new church home.
Here are a few questions to ask yourself before I send the official survey that you will email back to me before we do the one to one consultation.
What is your purpose in life? Do you know your top priorities in life? What is your vision?
This concludes the introduction to the first area of Consulting for Single Parents in the area of Emotional and Spiritual Stability. Stay tuned for the introduction to Child Rearing/Parenting.
As you can probably see, these questions and scenarios could fit any people group regardless of marital status. My why in life is to give back to single parents. I was helped so much as a single mom that I want to help other single parents. I have already helped a number of single parents and maybe, just maybe, I can help you, too.
Donate to Single Moms Unite!, LLC providing scholarships for Single Parents to benefit from Consulting for Single Parents
How I Intend to Live Everyday Life More with God in 2018
Prayer written in Coach Wooden’s Pyramid of Success by Wooden and Carty
…”Forgive me of my sins and help me gain a greater measure of control over my fallen nature through the power of Your Holy Spirit. And Lord, give me a passion to stay in Your will for an increasing period of time.” This prayer was written in Coach Wooden’s Pyramid of Success by John Wooden and Jay Carty P. 101
When I saw this prayer, I was reminded of a conversation I had with someone, years ago, about being in the presence of God. They thought it was impossible and not very productive to stay in God’s manifest presence all the time. It was suggested that a person could not function normally if they were under the influence of God’s Presence constantly. I wonder if that would be like Moses and how he went before God for the Children of Israel and when he came out from God’s presence, he was still glowing. Therefore, he wore a covering over part of his face. Exodus 34:29-35 (KJV)
Then awhile back, I had yet another conversation with someone else that it was impossible to have sinless days. And I contended that if you could have sinless minutes, moments or hours, why couldn’t it turn into a full day and even a week? I have not heard of anyone who sins all the time, 24/7. Yet, somehow, I have gotten away from pursuing that goal of having more sinless moments.
So this prayer of asking God to give me a passion to stay in His will for increasing periods of time falls in line with being in His presence longer and staying away from sin longer. I want that for my life. How about you? Have you ever really thought about this topic? Are you resigned to being so human that you set out expecting to fail, to sin, even daily? I don’t wake up expecting to sin. Yet, part of me is expecting to fail in some way.
Most people contend that we will never be perfect before going to heaven. But why not? Many people say we will always have a vice or two…or three. But why? As a Christian, who am I to decide what God can deliver me from or not? Who am I to have a pet sin and not surrender that sin to God? Yet I have heard it more than once that we all have a vice. Some believe we will always have some sin, like a particular one, always in our life.
So my challenge to myself is to not decide that if one sin takes longer to be done with that that must be the one I am assigned to have for the rest of my life. I actually believe that some people do not want to let go of certain sins and that some sins are comfortable. And for that one sin, they might not be praying that God would relieve them of it. It is quite the dichotomy to think that you could pray to God to get rid of all of the known (to you) sin and challenges towards a specific sin or toNOT pray and resolve yourself to thinking that one or more sins will always be in your life.
So now I ask myself, “Why can’t I die to sin?” Why can’t I ask God to take away my vices, all of them? Why can’t I strive for perfection? Or can I?
Philippians 3:14 says, “I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”
Hebrews 6:1 says, “Therefore leaving the principles of the doctrine of Christ, let us go on to perfection; not laying again the foundation of repentance from dead works, and of faith toward God.” (KJV) The Douay-Rheims Bible says for the same verse, “Wherefore, leaving the word of the beginning of Christ, let us go on to things more perfect, not laying again the foundation of penance from dead works, and of faith towards God,”
Philippians 3:13, “Brothers, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth to those things which are before,”…
I don’t want to make excuses for sin to be in my life. I don’t want to treat it like a gift to have a sin, then put the sin in its little box and kiss the box like it is a treasure to have this sin. I don’t want to justify the sin to myself or others. I want to be free of my sin(s).
Part of being free usually is preceded with acknowledging the sin in my life. How about you? Are you ready to acknowledge that something is a sin in your life? Are you ready to say goodbye to that sin?
I know it could be a tough question. So, who in your life is asking the hard questions to you?
There are spiritual examens that you and a friend, an accountability partner for your life, could read to one another and listen to each other’s answers to some key questions. Examples can be found here. Here is a brief definition of examen:
“The Examen of Consciousness is a way to look back over the day and consider where did you find God in the events of your day? Where did you get in the way of finding God in those events? Regular daily practice of the Examen allows you to reflect on the person you are and are becoming.” Found on the Examen Video site.
In the six years that I discipled Ladies in the ways of Jesus, I often shared a list of 10 Examen Questions. One is, “Have any of your financial dealings lacked integrity?” Another is, “Have you given priority time to your family?” And the tenth question is, “Have you just lied to me?” It makes you smile at the last question…if you did not lie or if you are caught, maybe one smiled in a sheepish way.
So, back to the initial prayer at the beginning of this blog, I pray, “Lord, give me a passion to stay in your will for increasing period of time.” Help me to gain “control over my fallen nature through the power of your Holy Spirit.”
Will you pray this prayer for yourself? Will you desire a less sinful life? Will you desire to be in His presence longer and longer? Do you desire to stay in His will for increasing periods of time? Will you seek an accountability partner to ask the hard questions about your lifestyle or sin in your life…daily, weekly or monthly?
I would love to pray with you for this desire in your life, new or old. Thanks for reading.
If you were challenged by this article, please send me a comment. My husband has already sent me quite a few as he read my rough draft.