Nek’ka Niche: Everything I know about Some Things!
So I was angry when I realized that some things I do are for my safety OR for my feeling safe.
Why do people think they know better than you? There are some things we are not going to just get over…at least not right away, probably.
Now I am a woman of Faith, of Christian Faith. I believe any and all things CAN be healed. I believe there is no other name higher than the name of Jesus, including my anxiety, my fears or the PTSD that plagues me sometimes.
But it angers me when people want to take away my safety net and they aren’t there to provide the safety I need or feel I need to go on. It’s like shut up or put up. I don’t mean to swear at y’all. But why, why, why…do imperfect humans presume to know how to help others when they haven’t experienced it themselves?
So case in point: When I pray with people who are on medicines or see doctors regularly, I don’t arbitrarily tell them they should not be taking their medicine or seeing their doctor BECAUSE I DON’T TAKE MEDICINE or go to the doctor. I have in the past; but today, as a rule, I don’t. One of my sayings is that if you don’t have faith to replace that medicine or doctor, with faith for your healing, you should probably keep taking your medicine and seeing you doctor until you can SAFELY let it go.
I am all about natural ways of healing and seeing naturopath doctors. And if I don’t have the same experience as the next person on medicine and visiting their doctor, then I am not the expert in their situation. They are…or someone else is. But I am not.
So my rant today stems from someone knocking on my door unannounced. And they knocked so loud and hard. When I looked out the window, it was a white van with the driver’s door wide open and I couldn’t see the person standing at my door. SCARY! At least SCARY for a person suffering from PTSD. (And people wonder why I don’t want them showing up on my doorstep unannounced!)
So I am going to take further action to make sure that does not happen again in the near future, i.e. alternate delivery address. You can’t stop all idiots. I realize that. Someone else will come and knock on my door and I can’t see their vehicle because it’s parked somewhere else…and we will deal with that situation when it happens.
PTSD is real. We who suffer from it must take steps to eliminate unnecessary frights, scares and things that upset us. For me, I am aware of my limits. And I was pretty frazzled when that DELIVERY man was at my door in his unmarked white van. I have a number of deals going on. And I have appointments to keep today and I might not get to everything…because I realize I am at my limit for stuff, for crap, for nonsense. Again, excuse my swearing.
Dear Soul, who is also suffering from PTSD, take care of yourself. Take extra precautions for those things that wig you out. Knocks on the door bother me. It doesn’t matter who it is. If I am not expecting you, then it’s at least an interruption of my thoughts. Not making excuses. This is me in the Raw.
This is Nek’ka Niche: Everything I know about some things!
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