Are You Undefeatable as a Single Parent?

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Are You Undefeatable as a Single Parent?

Being a single parent doesn’t mean you’ve been defeated.

Here is one single mom’s story:

 

When we were little, we knew single moms existed.  Maybe we were raised by one or maybe the neighbor was.

There is no one in this world that could have grown up without knowing a single mom but no one knows what it really means until you are one.

No one knows the emotions, the trials and the heartache that comes with it unless you’ve been one yourself. No one understands the sacrifices that we’ve had to take and the choices we have to make on a daily basis.

A lot of single moms relate to one another but not everyone shares the same story.  No one knows how it really is and the things we have to do in order to survive; not only financially but emotionally.  Some people do, in fact, choose to be a single mom and some don’t.  Some never thought it’d be them and there’s so much stigma and misunderstanding when it comes to being a single mom.  It is also very admirable and inspiring. The things that we do for our children are definitely impressive. We don’t always think so but when you were raised by one, you realize how much you didn’t appreciate.

My mother became a single mom the moment her husband died and again years later when my sister and I were born. She had my brother to help but the things that she did, I admire it so much more now.  My biggest complaint was that she worked all the time and that she left me home alone, frequently.  I understand now, she felt she had no other choice.  One thing that always stands out is that she always prepared meals for us and had a clean home.  She managed to do so much with such a busy schedule. She managed to take us to the beach no matter how tired she was.  We’re talking about a woman who was left to do it all on her own with three children and then she had two more later down the road.  Her only support system was my brother and she worked so hard for my baby sister and I.  She did what she had to do, like any mother or any parent out there.

My mother taught me a lot and I didn’t realize it until I became a single mom myself.  I have two children and I barely manage to keep it together.  I barely manage to keep my home clean and make dinner every day.  I think back and I don’t know how she did it.  I have learned so much along the years and I continue learning and growing so much more. We always think we know everything until we realize that we don’t.  I have had to spend more time at work than with my children.  I have missed milestones but I only did  it to maintain a roof over their head and to put clothes on their back.  We don’t have much but we have each other.  I feel like I have failed them so much.  Sometimes, I feel like I’m burdening them with my poor decisions and I feel like I don’t do enough.  I feel like they deserve better but then they tell me how happy they are and how much they love me. That’s when I realize that they see the beauty in me and their life. They don’t need material things…they just need their mom.  Maybe I’ll never be able to be perfect and maybe, I won’t always do enough.  But, they love me beyond my imperfections.

One of the hardest things for me as a single mom is not really the “having no partner”.

It is actually the fear of the unknown.

Sometimes I just don’t know if I’ll have the strength to do things. To be honest, I don’t know how I manage to do most things.  I just do it.  Childcare is expensive but I still have to work.  I have to juggle so many things on my own with little to no family support. I get to deal with all of the good and bad days.  At times, it feels like I have no one that understands.  It’s tough to know that two children depend on me and one mistake can make a great impact.  However, we have gone through so much together and as I look back I am amazed at how far I’ve come.

I don’t have the answers to everything but when I see another single mom, I get it.  I understand the struggles and the hardship.  Now that my mom has passed, I understand her so much more.  I love her even more. Single moms are definitely strong.  I know the love and the happiness their children bring to them is what pushes them to work so hard.  As mothers, we all do what we have to for our children especially in this world that makes us feel like it’s just trying to tear us apart.

I understand now, (all) the things that I didn’t understand that my mom had to do for us.

I see now that being a single mom is hard, overwhelming but very rewarding. We chose to step up and to do what’s right for our children.  The feelings and emotions that come with it are completely normal.  We may mess up a lot but our kids focus on the love they have for us and they don’t judge us. They don’t judge because they love us. Maybe they don’t understand what we have to do as parents but one day they will.

It may not always be easy and we have our struggles just like everyone else.  One thing I know now is that no one can love and do more for our children than us.  We may have wanted things to turn out a different way.  Or we may have chosen this route.

Being a single mother doesn’t mean you’ve been defeated; it means you’re undefeatable!

 

Natasha is a single mom in the closed group of Single Moms Unite!, LLC.  

It has been my pleasure sharing Natasha’s story.  For more stories from Natasha and other moms, check back or subscribe to the Consulting for Single Parent newsletter here.  My name is Nek’ka Migel and I look forward to serving more single parents in the Treasure Valley and beyond!

Below are the links to the landing pages to contact me for a one to one meeting or sign up for specific newsletter(s):

Chaplains for Businesses | Consulting for Single Parents | Choose to Succeed Referral Marketing

Clip Art by Nek’ka | watch videos about low cost Legal help then contact me at migel29.legalshield@gmail.com

or here.

Book a one to one session with Nek’ka today, in person or on the phone!

Part of my (Amazon) proceeds go to help Single Parents with the resources they need to get to their next level.  Click either box to make your Amazon purchases.

Thanks for Stopping By.

Sincerely and 

In Christ Name,

Nek’ka Migel

choose-to-succeed.org

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The Best Investment Is In Yourself

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The Best Investment Is In Yourself!

Invest in yourself!  Ever heard of that?

My business mentor tells me to spend more money on my own personal development than spending money on networking.  For me, spending money in network clubs is still a gamble for getting a good lead that turns into a closed lead.

So investing in myself is a more sure profit.

If you have been around sales much, you’ll see that salesmen are a dime a dozen.  If you can stand out from the bunch and make a good positive impression on your prospective client, they will more likely “buy you”… and your product.

I like to shop where people know my name, pronounce it correctly and provide good service.  I have choices in different locations and sometimes for a cheaper price.  So, good customer service will prompt me to travel a mile out of my way.  When I check out, let’s say, and the cashier asks me about my children and a specific activity we had told them about earlier, that impresses me.

So how much more so should a personal one to one salesman or woman remember things about their prospective or current clients?  Repeat business and future referrals are built on this quality.

Invest in yourself.  Work on your weaknesses.  Learn to remember names whether by writing them in your phone, notebook or the palm of your hand.  Hear their stories without thinking of your immediate rebuttal.  And don’t be afraid to ask their name again.  That sometimes give them a chance to be reminded of your name which they might have forgotten.

Don’t make excuses for not being able to remember names.  Work on it.  This qualities causes repeat business and referrals for future business.

I hope you enjoyed this small segment and will leave a comment.  Part of all my proceeds go to help single parents get to their next level.

Thanks for stopping by.

Below are the links to the landing pages to contact me for a one to one meeting or sign up for specific newsletter(s):

Chaplains for Businesses | Consulting for Single Parents | Choose to Succeed Referral Marketing

Clip Art by Nek’ka | watch videos about low cost Legal help then contact me at migel29.legalshield@gmail.com

or here.

Book a one to one session with Nek’ka today, in person or on the phone!

Find me on social media:  my links are below.

Part of my proceeds go to help Single Parents with the resources they need to get to their next level.  Click either box to make your Amazon purchases.

Again, Thanks for Stopping By.

Sincerely and 

In Christ Name,

Nek’ka Migel

choose-to-succeed.org

Find me on Social Media by clicking one of these links:

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Watch videos on my YouTube playlist

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Invest in Yourself!

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I Just Found Out A Reason To Have Discipline

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I Just Found A Reason To Have Discipline.

I just found out that discipline is related to self respect, self-esteem and self confidence. I was so shocked to discover this.  I don’t know why.  But I was.

I just discovered that discipline shows up in self esteem, self respect and self confidence

Some days, I have really good mornings when I wake up before it’s time to go out the door, two or three hours later. Those days that I got up on time and I did my morning rituals, I felt good, at the top of my game, even.

I thought it was obedience to God that was making me feel good and feel at the top of my game or at least close to being at the top of my game. I had no idea that behind that obedience was discipline that was causing me to be able to respect myself and to feel good that day.

Time out for random obedience… Keep your word!

I’m currently listening to Brian Tracy’s audiobook, called No Excuses!:  the power of self-discipline.   Brian Tracy is the one that opened my eyes to discipline being the key to having good self esteem.

Here is a quote from page 34 of Brian Tracy’s book: 

“Everyone wants to be successful. Everyone wants to be healthy, happy, thin, and rich. But most people are not willing to pay the price. Occasionally, they may be willing to pay part of the price, but they are not willing to pay the whole price. They always hold back. They always have some excuse or rationalization for not disciplining themselves to do everything that they need to do to achieve their goals.”

I have struggled with keeping my word to myself throughout the week and months prior. I’m aware of it.  I know that I need to fix it.  But what to do was a mystery to me.  I thought I could self-will myself into keeping my word to myself more regularly.   

Do you struggle with keeping your word to yourself?

Keep your word to yourself and others!

I recently learned, too, that what I do or don’t do in an area of my life or business affects another area. So I am challenged and convicted to work on self discipline. To work on discipline, in general. To raise my self-esteem and self-respect through discipline is important. 

What a concept! I had no idea that discipline was related to self-esteem, self respect and even self-confidence.  I’m interested in hearing what else Brian Tracy has to say on his CDs  because I am just on the first audiobook CD when I became aware of this concept.

Break’s Over! No More Excuses!

This is going to revolutionize my life. 

Break’s Over!!!

It’s truth!  And one thing I always say is to be on the side of Truth.   This gives me motivation to be more discipline because I want better self esteem, more self respect and higher self confidence with the help of the LORD, of course.  All good gifts do come from the LORD! (James 1:17)

Be on the side of truth: Not his side, her side, nor their side

Read the following excerpts from just one webpage on Discipline and Self Confidence. 

There is a close relationship between low self-confidence and lack of discipline. …the importance of following through on your commitments… Whenever you don’t, your self-confidence suffers.

There are reasons people don’t follow through on their commitments but most people avoid even thinking about these reasons. The same pattern of behavior continues and the self-confidence continues to go down.

If we really want to know why we fail to keep commitments, we need to look closely at our behavior.

When we fail to keep our promises, we find reasons to justify our slack behavior. We believe these excuses. But these are not the real reasons we fail to deliver.

The truth is we could keep nearly all of our commitments if we were willing. But we just do not want to pay the price required to fulfill our promises.

Most likely the price involves significant self-discipline. Most people want self-confidence without the discipline.

Most motivational speakers tell us that self-confidence is all about self-belief. They are right. Overcoming low self-confidence is about positive self-belief.

They imply that our behavior doesn’t matter. Say and think positively, they suggest, and we will painlessly go from low self-confidence to being self-confident.

Affirmations are fine but for them to work, we need to follow up the affirmations with action that completely reflects those affirmations. That takes self-discipline.”  Read the rest of article by clicking below.

https://northbrisbanepsychologists.com.au/low-self-confidence-and-self-discipline/

Here is another article from the internet: I googled self discipline and self-confidence:

“The Relationship Between Self Discipline and Self Esteem
There is a direct relationship between self-discipline and self esteem.

The more you practice self-mastery and self-control the more you like and value your self. The more you discipline yourself the greater is your sense of self-respect and personal pride.  

The more you practice self-discipline the better your self-image. You see yourself and think about yourself in a more positive way. You feel happier and more powerful as a person.

Napoleon Hill said that, “Self-discipline is the master key to riches.”

Let’s look at the definition of Discipline—

Training that corrects, molds, or perfects.
Control gained by enforcing obedience or order; orderly pattern of behavior; self-control.
No wonder we avoid discipline……we don’t have to do anything we don’t want to.

Right? Say yes…………..

What is discipline?

Doing the things you don’t want to do.
Doing something that needs to be done whether you want to or not.
It means you have to set things to do daily and you actually have to do them!
Someone who sticks with it and keeps going for it regardless of what obstacles lie before them.

Be stubborn!

Keep your goals in front of you. Review them and update them.
Box yourself in. Take away your choices. We have too many choices!
Start small.”

Read the article in full here: 

The Relationship Between Self Discipline and Self Esteem

I hope this article was helpful to you.  Feel free to pass it on and check out more of Brian Tracy’s books.  This one was fascinating to me, quite helpful and even painful to listen to parts of it.  I am a work in progress.  Are you? 

My name is Nek’ka Migel and it has been quite enlightening for me to write this article for my betterment.  I hope you get some takeaways that you can use.   

Sincerely and

in Christ Name,

Nek’ka M.

choose-to-succeed.org




Donate to Single Moms Unite!, LLC that provides scholarships for Single Parents to benefit from Consulting for Single Parents as well as helping them to get their legal Wills done to state guardianship of their minor kids.

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Video for Single Parents Consulting

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Nek’ka Migel was a single stay at home mother for 16 years, homeschooling 2 of her 3 children from K to 12th grade.  Her children went on to college and have done quite well for themselves.

Through Consulting for Single Parents, Nek’ka can help a single parent in 5 different areas: 

Emotional and Spiritual Stability, Child Rearing/parenting, Wardrobe/dieting/exercising, Business ideas/job helps, Financial/Budgeting plans. 

Sign up for the newsletter by clicking on Consulting for Single Parent link here.

 Click here to contact me.

Consulting for Single Parent on Emotional and Spiritual Stability

Information on Area 1 for Emotional and Spiritual Stability can be found here.  I will add information for Areas 2 to 5 as I get it written up.  


Donate to Single Moms Unite!, LLC that provides scholarships for Single Parents to benefit from Consulting for Single Parents as well as helping them to get their legal Wills done to state guardianship of their minor kids.

This was my first attempt at making an automated” video.  Thanks to Window’s Movie Maker, this baby boomer has made a video.  I hope to improve over time.  Meanwhile, this is just a short ad for Consulting for Single Parents.  After you’ve watched it, please leave a comment. 

Sincerely and

In Christ Name,

Nek’ka Migel

Consulting for Single Parents

choose-to-succeed.org

Single Moms, Join the closed Facebook ladies group at Single Moms Unite!, LLC Group  with the purple logo

Single dads, join the closed group at Consulting for Single Dads Group.

Like and have your friends like the page, Consulting for Single Parents to get awareness.

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Video for Single Parent Consulting 

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Consulting for Single Parent on Emotional and Spiritual Stability

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Hello.  My name is Nek’ka Migel.  I was a single mom for 16 years.  I homeschooled my 2 children from Kindergarten to 12th grade.  When they graduated from High School they went directly into college.  One got her 2 year certificate in Baking and the other has 4 years and running studying Mechanical Engineer.  Both daughters have had their own businesses.

One has done designer baking and the other has a web design business.  I would say they were successfully released into the world with many relational skills and the ability to live on their own successfully without my paying their way or having them move back home after college.  I am very happy for their success and their ability to make things work for their lives.

Consulting for Single Parents is a dba of Single Moms Unite!, LLC.  There is a Facebook page that you and your friends can like: click here.  There is a closed Facebook group for single moms: click here and a closed group for single dads: click here

If you would like to join my email newsletter list, go here to sign up.  

There are 5 areas for Single Parent consultation.

1. Emotional and Spiritual Stability

2. Child Rearing and Parenting skills

3. Wardrobe/Dieting/Exercising

4. Business ideas/Job helps

5. Financial/budgeting

This consultation process is to help guide you to make your own choices out of the tools I present or the thoughts that come to your mind as I speak and present short stories and local resources available.  I am not a Licensed Counselor but can refer you to another place if that is what you need.  I am more of a Peer Consultant who has experienced being a single parents and have victory over many areas in my life.  I am happy to share these experiences with you as they pertain to your life’s upcoming victories.

The reason I charge a nominal fee is because I have discovered that many people do not respect free.  But when there is “skin in the game”, they stay committed to the process or at least to begin the process.  Also, my time is valuable and if I travel to meet you in a coffee house, the gas in my car, cost dollars.

If you are here, you have decided to do the work necessary to get you to your next level.   So let me hear from you what you think you need.  The purpose of having one to one consultations is to get specific information to you for your own life.

Area 1:  Emotional and Spiritual stability.

What makes me a good authority on this matter is because I have stable emotions and I can share some ways to think and pray, if you are a praying person, to arrive at stable emotions.  I can be a peer consultant for PTSD as I am on my own journey and have made great strides in setting healthy boundaries and being able to enforce them.  I can be a peer consultant for alcoholism. I have been 30 years without abusing alcohol and the temptation to drink out of necessity has been gone for 30 years.

I have been a Christian for 30 years and have a good working knowledge of the Christian Holy bible and I have a good relationship with Our Father in Heaven.  So I believe I can be a good support in this area as well.  For more information on the ministry that I have done in my 30 years of being a Christian, I will refer you to the Video Resume for my being a Prayer Intercessor.  I also have a written copy if desired in my Chaplains for Businesses Newsletter.

So, what is your why for wanting to have greater emotional and spiritual well being?   How would this stability help you to get to your next level in life?  Part of this consultation requires you to think about your life and where you want to go.  My job is to help you in the good direction that you have chosen already.   So let’s get started.

Across the nation, there are a variety of organizations that can help you.

1. Stephen’s Ministry is designed to come along a gender to gender person going through an issue of life that is not too extreme yet it might be painful such as the death of a spouse or other love one, a divorce or you just can’t seem to keep working.

2. Celebrate Recovery helps a person deal with their hurts, habits and hangups.  It is here that I gained a year of setting healthy boundaries and I continue to work on procrastination and fear.  They also help with alcohol and substance abuse like a secular AA meeting might.   Celebrate Recovery is Christian based.

3. National Abuse Hotline is 800-799-7233.  The call is anonymous and they are trained very well to hear your situation before responding verbally on the phone. When I have called, they have never steered me wrong.

4. Healing Rooms are all over the USA.  This is another place you can get Christian prayer in addition to the prayer time you might have at your local church.  All Prayer Intercessors are vetted before they are allowed to serve.

And in your individual city there are other organizations that give a person a hand up.  In the Boise area, there is

1. Weekly prayer available at Sacred Heart Catholic Church.  They offer Christian prayers.

2. F.A.C.E.S. for classes on abuse and self defense. 208-577-4403

3. WCA for the abused woman or man, call 208-343-3688.  They have a number of resources such as a financial literacy class and a court advocate to make suggestions for how you can get further help on your legal case.

I am also familiar with a number of church denominations and would be happy to share that knowledge if you are looking for a new church home.

Here are a few questions to ask yourself before I send the official survey that you will email back to me before we do the one to one consultation.

What is your purpose in life? Do you know your top priorities in life?  What is your vision?

This concludes the introduction to the first area of Consulting for Single Parents in the area of Emotional and Spiritual Stability.  Stay tuned for the introduction to Child Rearing/Parenting.

As you can probably see, these questions and scenarios could fit any people group regardless of marital status.  My why in life is to give back to single parents.  I was helped so much as a single mom that I want to help other single parents. I have already helped a number of single parents and maybe, just maybe, I can help you, too.

Donate to Single Moms Unite!, LLC providing scholarships for Single Parents to benefit from Consulting for Single Parents 

Sincerely and

in Christ Name,

Nek’ka Migel 

Consulting for Single Parents

(moms and dads)

choose-to-succeed.org

Find me on Social Media by clicking one of these links:

Follow me on Twitter      Follow me on Instagram

Follow me on Pinterest    Find me on LinkedIn

Follow me on Google Plus    Follow me on Medium 

Watch videos on my YouTube playlist

 Follow Consulting for Single Parents on Facebook

 Follow Chaplains for Businesses on Facebook

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#choosetosucceed #familytime #lifestyle #familyfirst #motherhood
#parenthood #momlife #kidlife #toddler #kids #selfcare #singlemomlife #singlemomproblems
#winners #commitment #passion #drive #nevergiveup #focus #hope #patience #God #dreams #Goddreams #Faith #grace #ThinkRight #ThinkChristLike
#winners #nevergiveup #endurance #chaplains  #encourage #success #singles #healing  #counseling #prayer #relationship #fear #help #singleparent #family #parent #parenting #followme #yourdoinggreat #inspire #celebraterecovery #stephenministry #sacredheart #peerconsultant #prayerintercessor #nominalfee #kindergarten #12thgrade #nekkamigel #nextlevel #abusehotline #abuse #onetoone #parentingskills

Thank you!
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